


Baby Steps

by MachineryField



Series: Marching to the Beat (of Someone Else's Drum) [6]
Category: Xenoblade Chronicles
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Egil (Xenoblade Chronicles) Lives, Gen, Guilt, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:33:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28577562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MachineryField/pseuds/MachineryField
Summary: It’s been a good few months when a Machina that isn’t a member of the Junks Staff or his family approaches him without fear or hostility.
Relationships: Egil & Naonami | Neonik
Series: Marching to the Beat (of Someone Else's Drum) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2058093
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	Baby Steps

**Author's Note:**

> Egil and Grandma Neonik for the soul

It’s been a good few months when a Machina that isn’t a member of the Junks Staff or his family approaches him without fear or hostility. It’s Neonik, so Egil supposes it makes some sense that she would so quickly discard her fear and speak with him, but it still makes him uneasy. Standing in Colony 6, so out of his element as he helps that Reyn fellow move items he’s already forgotten the names of… It’s not a comfortable feeling.

“Egil, you haven’t changed a bit.” She speaks with a smile on her face, not realizing how those words make him flinch. “And here I was wondering if I would ever see you with my own eyes again. After all that’s happened, I truly thought I would pass before I had the chance.”

He bites back the bile that threatens as she speaks to him as if he is not a monster, bites back the guilt that comes with it, and speaks. “You say that, but you’re as spry as a 2000 year old as always, Neonik!”

“Ever the flatterer.” She slaps his arm and lets out a laugh. “I’m only moving so well thanks to the hard work of that Shulk fellow and his friends, you know.”

“They seem to be keen on helping anyone they can and cleaning up messes made by others, don’t they?” He sighs, looking towards Reyn and the boy Juju. “Mechonis knows how many of my messes they’ve cleaned up.”

“Egil.” Neonik’s tone is firmer now. “None of that self-pity, young man. You just keep working on making up for things. We want you to do better. Not wallow and stall!”

Egil nods, feeling like a child scolded for getting into a cookie jar. “Yes ma’am.”

“Good.” She reaches up and cups his face in her hands. “Oh, how mature you look now. It feels like just yesterday that I was pinching your cheeks and telling Miqol how big you’d gotten.”

He feels a bit embarrassed, hearing her coo like that, and he’s not sure if he likes that or the sick feeling more. Maybe they’re equally unsettling, he doesn’t know. “Just because I’m so much younger than you doesn’t mean you must baby me, Neonik!”

“Oh, but it’s so fun.” She chuckles a bit. “You get just as flustered now as you did then!”

“I’m not the best with praise! You know that!”

“And that’s what makes it fun.” Neonik winks at him when he huffs at her and releases his face from her grasp. “Watch out, I’ll need to make up for lost time.”

Egil shivers a bit at that, earning a laugh from the older Machina. “You truly show no mercy, Neonik.”

“Consider it part of your punishment for what you did.” Neonik suggests as she steps away from him. “If you hate it that much, you’ll start feeling like you’ve made up for what you did in no time.”

Egil rolls his eyes as he turns away. “I doubt it, you Machina are too kind to me after all that’s happened.”

“We understand the pain you were going through, Egil. Just because we did not agree with how you handled it doesn’t mean we want anything but the best for you.” She replies. “Just try and remember that, alright?”

He nods, but he’s not sure he can, seeing as the guilt is once again biting at him. Neonik truly asked something harder than she realized of him, didn’t she? It almost makes him want to laugh, but more than anything? More than anything it makes him once again wonder if this second chance was something he truly deserved.

\--

It’s later that night when Neonik finds him again, and Egil has no clue what he should say to her. He’d been sure to wait to wander the streets until most, including Neonik, had gone into their homes for the night. Had he misplanned, then? Or had she been waiting for him?

He’s overthinking it all when Neonik makes it to him and places a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s take a walk, if you’re done. I think you’ll love some of the nature around here.”

Egil swallows hard before nodding, not knowing what else to do. “Lead the way.”

He follows her as she takes his hand and walks him through Colony 6, pointing out her favorite flowers and other plants. She even gets a bunnit to stop for them and makes Egil pet it -- it’s hard, given how fragile it seems to be, but Egil makes it work. In a way, it’s nice…

Though he can’t help but feel he doesn’t deserve to do this. He should be working on the next prosthetic, not standing in nature with Neonik as the woman hums and smiles up at the sky. 

He crouches down and touches the petals of a flower with a sigh. Really, he thinks he should still be at the bottom of the sea with the Mechonis. The remnants of Bionis… they aren’t for him. Everyone is working so hard to overcome the pain Zanza had brought -- pain Egil had only added to.

“Egil.” Neonik speaks, her voice soft. “I brought you out here to make you feel better, not worse.”

Egil sighs, not looking back at her. “I’m sorry, it’s still hard for me to enjoy the little things like this.”

“I see…” She crouches next to him. “Then we’ll have to do this each time you visit Colony 6, see how it makes you feel each time. The more time you have to strive to make up for what you’ve done, the easier this should become.”

“You believe in me quite a bit, don’t you?”

Neonik giggles. “It’s hard not to when I remember what a sweet and talented boy you are. You just lost track of that for a while, that’s all.”

“Lost track of that for a while, hm…?” Egil closes his eyes and lets out a sigh. “I suppose we’ll see if you’re right in time, then.”


End file.
